Things people have said that have made me laugh this month

19/12/2017 § Leave a comment

  • That’s what we came for and that’s what’s gon make us come
  • For fuck sake don’t sit there is silence there’s nothing worse than getting naked to silence
  • He’s a cheap vegetarian jew, of course he has an electric car
  • Fuck off with your spotty dresses and your wine. ‘I’ve got two kids I need to run after them’, run after them a bit faster then you mongs
  • I could dress like a Japanese school girl but I have the body of a 40 year old woman
  • Men are weird, imma be rich
  • I’m not asking for the world, I’m asking for cheerios
  • I will stand on my head in a skirt for a beer
  • I’m sweating like a fat girl writing a love letter
  • Fanny out gloves on that’s how I do
  • She looks dead cute I bet she’s dead filthy
  • I thought she was having a heart attack, turns out she was just tired


11/08/2015 § Leave a comment

To give yourself over to another body. That’s all you want really. But to be owned and consumed by another. To swim inside the skin of your lover. Not have to breathe, not have to think. But you can’t live on love, and salt water’s no drink.

You’re dying of thirst so we feast on each other. The sea is a still and violent mother. The blood round here pours down the water. Each wave a lamb lead to the slaughter. And like children that she just can’t teach. We break, and break, and break, and break ourselves upon the beach.


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